Dear Jen,
Miss you! It's strange to consider how many different options I have for written communication with you. I think sometimes I just pick one at random. This time it is the blog, just to change things up, you know.
Today I had the pleasure of being told by a virtual stranger what a terrible person I am--for real. He's a man I think I may have met but at least have definitely seen in the flesh at least one time. He is a member of my church (that never attends, clearly), and so when he friended me on Facebook a year or two ago I felt compelled to accept, although I usually dislike adding anyone I don't know more about than their first and last name. So obviously, because he's been privy to my varied and random online posts and discourses over a matter of months he is in a position to make a valid assessment of my character.
Yup.
I'm not actually upset about it. I mean I guess I'm a bit disturbed. But more I think it's just kind of funny--especially because the reason I offended him so greatly that he just couldn't take it anymore was that a friend of mine commented on something, to which I responded with a silly and innocuous comment, including a goofy recount of adventures back in the day. It was just too much, Jen. No one can be that offensive and get away with it. Something had to be done! And he, a near total stranger, was the one to finally say what everyone he's never talked to have been thinking all this time, but just couldn't bring themselves to say it (for the blinding rage, of course). So you see, I deserved this virtual tongue lashing, oh yes I did. And just to prove how serious he was, he unfriended me, OH YES HE DID.
I'm going to admit my first thought after reading that was, "Oh...are we Facebook friends? Huh. Yeah, I guess we are--sorry: were."
The extra funny thing is that several months ago I deleted several "friends" using the criteria of "those I consider to be people who don't know me". It could be people I'd added for politeness because of local associations, it could be friends I hadn't spoken to in ten years, it could be distant relatives I'm not even sure I've ever seen in person--those types. And I remember pausing over him and thinking that if he started coming to church regularly I might conceivably get to know him and then he might be one of those people who keeps track of Facebook friends and then becomes offended when he realizes I deleted him...or something. I remember having this conversation in my mind--I actually don't even remember the result of it. Did I delete him? I don't know, it's not that important in my day-to-day. Anyway, so I actually already wanted to delete him, and the reason I went about deleting all these people was exactly this reason! Because strangers often don't understand tone and you wind up accidentally offending someone you don't even really care about.
You know?
Anyway, I didn't mean to write this much about it. It was so silly. I should add that I did finally figure out why he might have such an opinion of me: one time I posted something about how I didn't understand the big uproar about the EI changes (there was big uproar here. Did you even hear about it in BC?), and he disagreed with me, and obviously felt that because I didn't appear sympathetic to people's complaints I was evil. And I can only guess that he's been reading everything I've written henceforth with this filter on.
So that's why I think he is certain I'm a terrible human being. And like I said, it hasn't really affected me much, except that I kind of feel like in a way he's made a fool of himself, because unless I'm very very wrong and someone needs to humble me, I don't think any of the other people commenting on there today (who all do know me in person) would agree with his assessment of my character (I sure hope they don't, because he was pretty much dead wrong).
You know, it was actually a really fascinating reminder of how we can't judge anyone. This man felt he knew me simply from my casual and silly correspondences over a social media platform--because that's all of me that he saw. How is that any different than me thinking I have the right to judge the situation of a friend, or a family member? My judging shows that I think I have all the pertinent information to make that call. But no one ever has the whole story--no matter how well they know someone--no one except God. It would be good to remember that--I don't want to be that fool!
So that was something from my day. Monday Brad goes back to school, and Tuesday Maggie's Place starts up again, and Wednesday our Truro homeschool club will probably hang out again, and Thursday I've got a homeschool sledding party lined up...and I'm extremely glad. "Taking a break" from the routine when you've got young kids just feels like isolation to me! It was good having Brad home in some ways--the kids got to go to the pool like five times, and now Ev swims quite well without any flotation devices (and does flips and spins and swims underwater) and Gav has gotten over his fear and mastered the life jacket swim technique! It's awesome! But I'm still looking forward to the routine--and of course the wind-down of this whole school thing!!!!!!! (enough exclamation marks, you think?)
We also are going to try adding a new thing to our routine, and I know it seems a lot like a New Year's Resolution, but I'll have you know that I never make New Year's Resolutions because it just seems so strange to me to decide to make positive changes in your life at some random time every year--or worse, to wait to make those changes till that random time! Like, why? Just make the change when you think of it...ANYWAY, we thought of it now, and what it is, see, is Brad really needs to be doing physical activity (for his leg, you know), and he's been slacking all last semester, and so I suggested he go before his 9 am classes on Mon, Wed and Fri, and to help motivate, I told him we'd ALL go, and while he does the gym thing, I'll do the indoor walking track thing (maybe eventually indoor running track thing). So...we'll see how it goes. It is NOT a New Year's Resolution. It's a Start of the Semester Re-Try. Yup. Catchy, I know. Remind me in a few weeks to reveal whether we've actually kept it up or not--I'm really hoping the extra motivation of knowing that this is really important for Brad will mean that we are still doing it.
Ok! We must talk in real-time soon!
Love,
Jacqui
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